What is going on?!? Three more calendars addressed to diners have been returned by the post office. They say on them "Not Deliverable As Addressed"-- what? I've got the name of the diner, the street address, the city, the state, and the ZIP CODE-- what more could they possibly need? A list of the breakfast specials? What looks like "WTF" is scrawled on the Kim's Diner envelope, which is exactly what I said. But I think it actually says, "UTF" or Unable To Forward. Try forwarding into the mail slot, that's my suggestion.

It used to be you could just approximate an address and your friendly neighborhood mailperson, blessed with years of experience, would get it there OK. Do you want to know what the world will look like once the machines take over? See: above. Sure we all have a lot of "leisure time" -- but what do we do with it? Look for jobs which no longer exist. And the next thing you know we're pissing off the machines and they're coldly executing us.

But maybe I got the addresses wrong. I'll have to look them up and resend them. Has anyone been to these three diners yet? Or four including the Cutchogue. Do they actually exist, or are they the byproducts of some elaborate internet hoax? Or maybe they have all closed, are boarded up tight, or have been turned into Walgreens. Hopefully our operatives will soon turn up some clues.